Visitors are really scary

You’re sitting there on the carpet, loving life, sniffing and licking whatever bit of your body you want to (I’m pretending to be a dog, by the way). And then it happens.

Knock, knock.

Every nerve in your body powers up. Your initial attempt to act cool ‘Who could that be, man? Not bothered really, dude. I’m not panicking, no way’ fails.

Before you know it you’re on your back legs screaming until you dislocate your lungs. Very very embarrassing, three seconds later when Grandma walks in.

‘What a silly dog, get down.’

Whoops.

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