Norman’s Walk – Jan 2023
A busy January walking around with Norman. It started off with a shocking discovery. On the path just down from our house, Norman found Mick Hucknall’s hair.
I know, an amazing find, and not often seen without its owner. But not as breathtaking as this discovery down on the beach, a rare sighting of a Horned Blue Wall Chomper.
I was thrilled to have seen that. But my high spirits were short-lived, because further along the coast what I saw made me drop to my knees and beat the sand with my fists, shrieking ‘You maniacs! You blew it up! Damn you! Goddamn you all to hell!’ It might seem a bit dramatic to you, but look
I’d been on Earth all along. It took me a while to get over that. Made worse when most of West Cumbria was razed to the ground by these two.
And when I did eventually go back to the beach look what came out of the sea.
Norman doesn’t really like funny-looking tripod things from Mars walking onto the beach when he’s there.
After all those aliens and monsters, I needed a big fat hug.
That’s better.
Mid-month I watched a great documentary on intelligent trees. I’m not sure how factually correct it was.
There was a bit of a cold spell after that, and I discovered I had a twin.
His January diet seems to be going a lot better than mine.
Here’s a quick look at Norman running, captured live from my nose cam.
We climbed a couple of mountains this month.
And I’ve never seen any creature more disappointed to get to the top.
It’s the climb, Norman, have you never seen Hannah Montana: The Movie? No, neither have I, honest, well only 16 times (Excuse: I have children who are female).
We nearly got lost on the way down until we saw this.
Also, spotted this by the river, no one goes down there much, not since the late Triassic.
I don’t mind those creatures as long as they stay out of town, but I saw this in a children’s play area, last week.
Have a quick look before letting your kids loose on the swings, that’s my advice.
Makes you think, doesn’t it?
Remember this guy from the summer?
Well, he’s not looking quite so chuffed with himself now.
Doctor Who turned up again and sucked half the town into a multi-dimensional temporal vortex, like he usually does. What a pest. But I never knew the Tardis ran on steam.
Maybe just a new wood-burner for the winter. The town’s nerves are in bits because of him, there seems to have been a big uptake in vaping.
If you believe in all that multi-dimensional stuff, in our dimension I found the final resting place of Doc Ock.
It was still twitching, which is worrying.
Hope he doesn’t come back from the dead and chase me like this guy did.
Although, when I give up this mortal coil, don’t think my first option would be to come back as a white plastic bag stuck on barbed wire, would you?
Saw this in the sky.
And I think I’ve found the solution to the energy crisis.
No lecky bills, no council tax, two free chairs – we’re moving in this afternoon
I’ll leave you with this little character. The clouds have been grey and no fun recently but at least he’s trying.
Have a great weekend.
Take care and all the best,
Ian
(If you want to leave a comment below, that would be great)
Cracking pictures as per usual Ian.
Loving your weekly updates.
I’m in day 5 of my 5 day gig fest to support IVW( Independent Venue Week). I’ve not travelled far but what can I do when so much talent lands on my doorstep. Here is the list of who I have seen:
Monday…..Hull New Adelphi….The Bug Club
Tuesday…The Crescent, York….Rozi Plain supported by the talented Mayshe Mayshe
Wednesday….Hull New Adelphi…..Rozi Plain ( again) supported by The Silver Reserve
Last night…..The Crescent, York….Willie J Healey and his band….they were immense.
Tonight……..The Crescent, York……Anna Meredith supported by Elsa Hewitt
I am at the ripe old-ish age of 59 and I refuse to go down without a fight. It’s better to burn out than fade away I say.
Keep up the more than average work?
Kind Regards,
Andy
Wow Andy, you’re having a great week and a great thing to support. I often go to The Brickyard in Carlisle, mostly for tribute bands but it’s a great venue and the bands are always good. Enjoy Anna Meridith tonight and definitely don’t go down without a fight:)
Norman is so handsome,
always enjoy my Friday morning break reading your emails,
Please keep on keeping on….
thanks Julie
Thanks Julie, glad you enjoyed it. Maybe I won’t tell Norman about his handsomeness, he’s getting too big for his paws 🙂 Have a good weekend
I’ll have a large bag of whatever you’re smoking/ingesting please.
Haha Adi, that’s without stimulants, better keep off my computer after I’ve had a couple of wines tonight 🙂
What would a Friday morning be without your humour?
Thank you
Thanks Michelle, that’s nice of you to say. Hope your Friday is going well 🙂
Absolutely love reading your Friday updates! Really makes me smile and chuckle!
Love them and Norman of course!! But mostly love your view on the world!
Thank you, Alison
Thanks Alison, really glad you like them. Judging from a few comments recently, I think people assume I’m taking powerful hallucinogenics or something, but definitely not. I can’t vouch for Norman though 🙂
Thanks Ian, your nutty ramblings were just what I needed to put a smile on my face after a long week – keep ’em up!
TTFN
Sharon x
Thanks Sharon, sounds like a busy week for you. Hope you have a good weekend 🙂
Really enjoy your emails. Makes me look differently at things whilst out walking. ?
Thanks Kath, yes, my morning walks are now full of strange creatures that I made up. Occasionally I say Hi to them, which is even stranger 🙂
Love it, that I’m not the only one seeing those “endless possibilities” when out walking, go Ian!
Glad you can see them too Hilary, phew 🙂
‘Saw this in the sky.’
titter titter.
🙂 Glad you enjoyed that 🙂
Top Bobbins as usual. Could you skwiggle Billy Caspar flicking a V from Kes, think it would be a cool shirt
Thanks Stephen. I will put that on the to-do list, you’re right it sounds like a cool idea. Have a good weekend 🙂
The “intelligent ” tree really reminds me of Sid the sloth from Ice Age??
Haha, yes he does a bit, maybe related 🙂
I thought that was Ed Sheerans hair!
haha, maybe I’ve got confused 🙂
Great photos as always. You should publish them all in a book. Journal style, month by month. With Norman’s permission obviously! ??
Thanks Chris, glad you like the photos. I will ask Norman if I can do that. Have a great weekend 🙂
My partner had to come and find out what I was laughing at – thanks for the weekly lol moments
Glad you enjoyed it, Alison. Hope your partner did too. Have a great weekend 🙂
Love your stories….love the Lake district…..already reserved our b&b in beautiful Keswick for next Christmas. Keep up the good work..love to Norman xxx
Love your stories, love the Lake district. We have a yearly break in beautiful Keswick…..always feel sad when we leave. Keep up the good work and love to Norman ??
Thanks Jan and glad you like the Lakes. I take me mam and Norman to Keswick most Wednesdays for dog biscuits and coffee. Me mam likes dog biscuits 🙂
Reading that your Mum enjoys a Gravybone or two, I can’t help sharing this: one year, I was going to Australia over Christmas and asked a friend to dog sit in my home. I should tell you I make dog treats for my pooch. I keep them in an old fashioned glass sweetie jar on the counter. When I got back from my trip, my friend said ‘I liked those biscuits you made, very herby, nice with a cup of tea!
Haha, that’s funny and they sound delicious 🙂
Haha this is great! had me giggling all the way through! …….. nose-cam …… love it