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1 Jan 21 – Happy New Year

Happy New Year Everyone,

Hope you are still well and ‘enjoying’ your Christmas break.

I think ‘enjoying’ should always be in quotation marks to imply irony or sarcasm, because obviously ‘enjoyment’ (which should also be in quotation marks) is a sensation people once had, back in the days before the DPD delivery man became your only friend.

But, as always, I’ve got some exciting news. No, it’s not that I got a new Alexa for my office, I wouldn’t bore you about that, although the things that thing can do are incredible

No, my news is much better than that – I also got the fancy plugs so I can turn off my lights without exhausting myself by reaching out an arm and extending a finger. Sitting in the dark talking to your plug has never been more fun.

But of course, it can’t possibly stop there. Now it’s become so insufferable to have to get up and turn the lamp on in the corner of the living room, six feet from where I’m sitting. How can people put up with that outrage? I’ve got six more fancy plugs coming and probably more afterwards.

If your lights go out any time soon, it’s not a power cut, it’s me, I’ve taken control.

So sorry, I had a couple of sherries last night when I started this so it went a bit megalomanic…

Here’s a selfie from last night at our house

And this strange thing was found on my daughter’s plate on Christmas day.

Have a ‘great’ (also needs the quotations) day today and let’s hope thing’s get better very soon.

Take care and all the best,

Ian

1 Jan 21 – Happy New Year

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